Like Opinions, Everyone's Got One And They Think Everyone's Stinks But Their Own

Friends,

Pheid's Slave here with a message from her, and I quote:

"So I was at Borders the other night with my friend Terri, reading about Feng Shui, Yin Yang, Qi, Prada and all that "balance" crap, yada yada yada, and she pulls out this book she just found on the shelves called, "An Encyclopedia of ASSHOLES: Scumbags, Slimeballs, Sleazoids, Lowlifes, and Jerks, Etc" by Kristoffer Darlington and Diane Law.

Oh great, I thought. Just what I need right now - something pessimistic to intrude on my contemplative and positive foray into peacefulness.

But surprisingly, it was just what I needed. This book is so funny (yep, Dumbya himself is in there, as if that's a surprise), that it's worth the read. It covers all kinds of @#&holes, from political and religious, to media, corporate, film, sporting and music.

There's serious commentary in there providing true substance (which has kept me reading) but the humor is what I needed and it really gave me a lift. Check it out sometime you're in Borders or another bookstore and let me know what you think.

Believe me, it provides a good jumping-off point for lively coffee chat. ;)

Happy trails and see everyone soon!

(Slaveboy: you're doing a great job, and keep up the good work! In fact, I'm so impressed that I'm tempted to just keep you on as my personal assistant and sex slave. ;) Oh, but try not to hang your wet chest armor, helmet and running sandals on my balcony, will you please? Condo management called and kindly asked me to keep my clothing out of others' sight and was I appearing as a gladiator in a play somewhere or something? Oh, and is the briki clean yet? Did you see my shopping list? I have something that needs to go into the mail today or else it'll be late. Let's see...what else. Oh, did you get my oil changed? Thanks for doing the laundry the other day, but I can't find my Injinji socks. Where are they? Thanks so much for your help. --Pheid.)"

Okay people. Back up the truck...

Is it me, or are all women this high maintenance? Sheesh. Personal assistant and sex slave? Hey, I'm just a messenger! I didn't sign up for all this other stuff! Well, come to think of it, I guess that's really what relationships boil down to anyway. We're all someone's personal assistant. Have services, will travel, and if I can get something out of it while I'm here, all the better.

Anyway, now that I've delivered Boss' message, I must be off to remove my running gear from Slavedriver's balcony. I bid you farewell until she gives me another message to deliver. 'spose she expects me to make her chicken soup and serve it to her on a tray in bed or something, too, and make her breakfast every morning, do the laundry and dishes, and give her massages when she's sore. I've noticed she sits at that computer of hers in a hunched posture. Yeah, she'll be wanting massages. [rolling eyes]

Ya can't hack up that hairball soon enough, Toots, so I can be on the way to my next adventure, delivering a new message!

At least I'll have clean clothes.

Like the wind...

Pheid's Slave

Photo credits:
Tom Tomorrow's www.themodernworld.org
And You Think Your Job Stinks? - http://www.mygirlyspace.com/